Songs of a Broken Heart
by ERclaireER
Summary: Originally called Tony's Girl. Don't worry, I'm not a fan of the NeelaGates relationship. Anyways, Ray see's Gates and Neela kiss and he can't help but feel jealous. He copes with these feelings with a little help from his guitar. Songfiction
1. Chapter 1

**Disclaimer: I do not own ER or any of its characters. I do not own the song Jessie's Girl by Rick Springfield. I do however own this version of the song which I call Tony's Girl.**

**Authors Note: This is set after Ray see's Neela and Gates kissing in the conference room. Depending on the reviews I get, I may add on to this with different songs, kind of like a parody of sorts. But for now it's a oneshot.**

Ray sat on the edge of his bed, one leg curled under him and the other hanging off the side, his foot planted on the floor for support. In his arms he held his guitar. The song he play wasn't a new song for his band, no not this one. "This song," he thought, "is for all of the jealous guys out there."

"_Tony's not a friend, no, never been a good friend of mine. I've noticed something's changed that ain't hard to define. Tony's got himself a girl and I've longed to make her mine. And she's watching him with those eyes. And she's lovin' him with that body, I just know it. Yeah 'n' he's holding her in his arms late, late at night._

_You know, I wish that I had Tony's girl. I wish that I had Tony's girl. Where else can I find a woman like that. I don't wanna play along with the charade, not when I know that a guy like him ain't never gonna change. You know, I felt so alone when I watched them as they kissed. I wanna tell her that I love her, but I'm afraid that chance I've missed. 'Cos she's watching him with those eyes. And she's lovin him with that body, I just know it. And he's holding her in his arms late, late at night._

_Like Tony's girl, I wish that I had Tony's girl. Where else can I find a woman? Where else can I find a woman like that? And I'm lookin' in the mirror all the time, wondering what she didn't see in me. I've been patient, I've given her space. Ain't that the way love supposed to be? Tell me, where else can I find a woman like that?"_

Ray let the music consume him. He closed his eyes and let his fingers do all of the work. They ran across the strings with ease and filled the room with a hard rock melody, full of the raw emotion he'd kept bottled up inside ever since Neela drove away in that taxi, never looking back.

" _You know, I wish that I had Tony's girl, I wish that I had Tony's girl. I want Tony's girl, where else can I find a woman like that, like Tony's girl. I wish that I had Tony's girl. I want, I want Tony's girl."_


	2. Chapter 2

Disclaimer: ER is not mine, nor is this song. Used in this chapter was the song Always by Bon Jovi

Authors Note: I had to resubmit this chapter because I forgot to mention the song, sorry about that. Nothing's changed however.

For Ray, there wasn't a problem that alcohol couldn't solve, temporarily of course. On this particular evening, he tested that theory at one of Chicago's newer nightclubs. It was karaoke night but he didn't care and went inside regardless. Anyone who knew Ray, really knew him, would know that, in his mind, karaoke was a big joke, an opportunity for tone deaf amateurs to butcher perfectly good songs. He sat down at the bar, laying a few crumpled dollar bills on the counter, and asked the bar tender to bring him a stiff drink.

It wasn't long before Ray was totally plastered. He and a few other drunken bar-goers laughed at and loudly mocked the karaoke singers. Ray, of course, was by far the loudest. When someone, sober and offended by their rude behavior, dared him to go up and try it himself. Ray complied, eager to show up this man and everyone here, because he could actually carry a tune. He staggered up to the stage, grinning.

His song was picked at random. As he stood on that stage and the intro chords began to play through the speakers, he made a pivotal discovery. His alcohol theory, which for such a long time had been accurate, had tonight been proven wrong. He may have been drunk out of his mind but still he couldn't stop thinking about her. He couldn't shake the image of her kissing Gates from his memory. Even this song he was about to attempt, though totally not his style, made him aware of his current loneliness. He grabbed hold of the mic stand and began to sing as the lyrics appeared across the screen.

The club sat in silence. Either they were awed by his sudden shift in emotion or they couldn't understand a word he said due to his slightly slurred speech. One way or the other Ray was glad. Right now he was vulnerable and unpredictable, and had someone reacted in any other way, the consequences could get ugly.

And I  
Will love you  
Baby  
Always

And I'll be there  
Forever and a day  
Always

I'll be there  
'Til the stars don't shine  
'Til the heavens burst  
And the words don't rhyme

I know when I die  
You'll be on my mind  
And I'll love you  
Always

Now your pictures that  
You left behind  
Are just memories  
Of a different life

Some that made us laugh  
Some that made us cry  
One that made you  
Have to say goodbye

What I'd give to run my fingers  
Through your hair  
Touch your lips  
To hold you near

When you say your prayers  
Try to understand  
I've made mistakes  
I'm just a man

When he holds you close  
When he pulls you near  
When he says the words  
You've been needing to hear

I wish I was him  
'Cuz these words of mine  
To say to you  
'Til the end of time

And I will love you, baby  
Always

And I'll be there  
Forever and a day  
Always

If you told me to cry for you, I could  
If you told me to die for you, I would  
Take a look at my face  
There's no price I won't pay  
To say these words to you

Well, there ain't no luck  
In these loaded dice  
But baby if you give me  
Just one more try

We can pack up our old dreams  
And our old lives  
We'll find a place  
Where the sun still shines

Yeah, I...  
Will love you  
Baby  
Always

And I'll be there  
Forever and a day  
Always

I'll be there  
'Til the stars don't shine  
'Til the heavens burst  
And the words don't rhyme

I know when I die  
You'll be on my mind  
And I'll love you  
Always

He didn't bother to wait for a response, not from the man who dared him, not even from his drunken buddies. He walked off stage and proceeded out the door, not looking back.


End file.
